By Scott Lowther
EMPATHIC? MY SHARED CONDOLENCES
Yes, I too am an empath and for those that might not know what that entails, the only education you may have on the topic is airy fairy new age healing articles touting the wonderments of being an "empathic healer". First, allow me to define what it means to be empathic. It means that you can tune into other individual's moods, attitudes, feelings and sometimes thoughts. If you are only an empath, you are not considered psychic because you cannot foretell the future and/or should a person wish to deceive you in conversation you stand only a little better chance than the normal individual at seeing through the deception. However, you are damn close to being psychic or you may have psychic talents that have not been awakened.
Second, it is this skill of identification that makes you this wonderful healer. Caring, kind, attentive and completely miserable at times. If you dread with all of your being funerals, family get togethers, and unstructured debates then you might be an empath. The reason for your misery is that without knowing it, your friends, family and even total strangers can pick up on the receptivity of your gift and rather than seeing the warm blanket of energy that is there for them to snuggle up in, they instead see a punching bag or a pinata. They accomplish this by a technique known as projection and energy drain.
Projection is easy to identify, it normally occurs during the course of your conversation with an individual who is upset with another person or group of people. While listening to the other person's strife, a bizarre twist occurs...they project the source of their upset onto you thereby making you a target. Identify when this happens by an increase of their use of apparent role playing. They will use the word "You" a lot even when talking about another person or group of people and they will point directly at you. When this happens you have gone from being a friendly ear to an unwilling target. Nip this quickly by asking them to use different pronouns or if you are worried that you may upset them by asking them to rephrase their dialogue then cover your solar plexus with both hands and focus on hardening your aura from the inside out. *If that last part sounds like hokey new age crap, I endeavor you to at least try the technique, you'll find that the person who is projecting will increase the intensity of the attack as you have made it harder for them to hit your core.
Energy drain in these situations is inevitable unless you cut short the conversation and tell the individual that you just can't listen to their angst at this time. Of course, you are not going to say that because you are an empath and it is in your nature to help, inspire, and nurture others. Again, the defense against complete energy drain is a focus on hardening your aura and covering your solar plexus. Be prepared for the next inevitability, the individual may hate you for a certain time period. During the conversation, you represented the source of their anger and/or grief. They will feel better but, do not expect them to either thank you or love you for giving them something to beat up. Over time you'll recognize and identify those that use you for these purposes. Don't take it personally a lot of the time they're unaware that they're even being a soul sucking jerk. Do, however take a stand on how much soul you allow them to suck at any certain time.
At the end of the day an empath is worn out, especially if they were a target. So light up the incense, take a bath or shower, use a salt scrub, perform some sort of grounding exercise, and restore your aura through meditation ( The Middle Pillar exercise is a good one.) In all cases remember this one fact, they need you more than you need them. Never be afraid to walk away. Hope you found this useful.